Plastic Shields and Wooden Swords

On the Burning Away
JCD Kerwin

A siren screams and
radiates back the screen
of my black and white, black static
cellophane, underwater,
claustrophobic world.
I never see,
never see,
I never ever see kaleidoscope colors,
never a light-bright cornucopia of
my ten-year-old, happy-go-lucky dreams.
Those stupid fucking reveries
blew up in brimstone fire when
I learned there’s no such thing as Faraway
and you can’t sew stars into your pockets.

[The fruit of a thousand apple trees would
taste better if the snake would nicely mention
the seeds are made of cyanide.
Instead my eyes go wide
as I lean back and hack
for air while I wait to breathe again.]

It all fades together in the same old
coffee-drenched, psychotic robotic days.
The air smells like burning plastic and
we’re all electric blinking lights trying so damn hard
to make math problems into Green jobs because
no one gives a shit about paper anymore.

Libraries are just graveyards for all the little children’s dreams.

When I grow up I’ll keep a junkyard
so I can save out-of-date non-collectibles
that everyone’s forgotten and
everyone thinks are just myths
and legends of a time that never was.
(I’ll keep books in my basement and
become a relic just like them.)

I’ll wrap myself in armor
and scream stories at computer screens
and make-believe
the people of the world can hear me when I say
I’m saving them…
I’m saving them…
I just want to save you.

Oct., 2012

Made-up Words Like Thundercane

Sometimes it feels as though you could stomp your feet and make earthquakes erupt from fault lines coming from your insides. Sometimes it feels like mountains in your lungs are crumbling into oceans, making sea foam turn into hurricanes.  Sometimes you think if you were to open your mouth those hurricanes would escape your lips in a supernova. Sometimes you’re sure if you were to prick your finger, your blood would run India Ink instead of plasma red. And then suddenly, all at once, you realize someday you will, most certainly, burst into a thousand, shining letters because you are made of thundercane stories.

Also:

…because currently I’ve been replaying it fifty times on my mp3 player. I’m slightly tweaked like that.

I’m gonna go put my goggles back on and pretend I can fly.

Rhodedendronneverendon

Rhodedendronneverendon
J.C.D. Kerwin

At midnights, I’m drunk-staring,
caterwauling captions to my nightmares
and keeping ghosts from trampling down
my front door.

I’ve got that bad disease called heartache and
there’s no cure for the self-inflicted catastrophe.
I’m hopeless.
And a wreck.

Still got your number
tattooed to my eyelids so when
I close my eyes I can blink-dial your smile.
It’s better than scraping razorblades
across the photographs of us.

I’m dreaming of you
[and drowning.]
You’re not dreaming of me
[because you left me to empty bottles and worn-out recordings.]
I still remember your name.

July, 2011